This comic perfectly illustrates how I am spending my nights recently. Follow my other blog newmamadiaries.wordpress.com to get a look at how I am dealing with motherhood.
One thing I quickly realized when my baby boy was born was how hard it suddenly became getting things done.
People did warn me that babies, especially breastfed ones, take a lot of your time.
I considered this and told my mom, “I guess I will need a week to figure it out.” I asked her then, woman to woman, to pass on to me all her secrets about managing motherhood and balancing it with work.
Yes, I was super naive. There are no secrets. My mom is just a super-woman who managed to raise 3 children while working, not unlike many other mothers out there who are not me.
Six weeks later, I can only congratulate myself on being able to keep my child alive and healthy. As for getting things done in the mean time, I am struggling.
I am a mess of a stay-at-home mother/aspiring author. Dishes pile up, the bed doesn’t get made, laundry doesn’t get folded, food gets burned; also blogs don’t get written, stories don’t get published, novels don’t get edited or sent out. Instead I increasingly find myself (figuratively) sitting in a corner of my apartment reciting all the ways that I am a complete and utter failure.
Combine that with sleep deprivation and you get depression lurking at every corner, sharpening its claws and teeth, ready to attack.
But, I should be happy with my life. I have wonderful husband and a healthy, sweet baby boy…what else could I want?
I want to get things done. I don’t want to be just a mama; I want to be an accomplished mama whose son will be proud of her.
Take one step at a time.
When I had difficult projects at my former jobs or at college, I panicked for 5 minutes, got depressed for 10, but finally I made checklists.
Accomplishing one thing at a time not only made me feel good, but got me closer to my goals.
I thought, if I do one new thing a day, get used to it, make it part of my routine and then introduce another, I will, maybe, be able to get things done!
It may not make me an overnight success as a wife/mother/author but each day will be a success.