This comic perfectly illustrates how I am spending my nights recently. Follow my other blog newmamadiaries.wordpress.com to get a look at how I am dealing with motherhood.
One thing I quickly realized when my baby boy was born was how hard it suddenly became getting things done.
People did warn me that babies, especially breastfed ones, take a lot of your time.
I considered this and told my mom, “I guess I will need a week to figure it out.” I asked her then, woman to woman, to pass on to me all her secrets about managing motherhood and balancing it with work.
Yes, I was super naive. There are no secrets. My mom is just a super-woman who managed to raise 3 children while working, not unlike many other mothers out there who are not me.
Six weeks later, I can only congratulate myself on being able to keep my child alive and healthy. As for getting things done in the mean time, I am struggling.
I am a mess of a stay-at-home mother/aspiring author. Dishes pile up, the bed doesn’t get made, laundry doesn’t get folded, food gets burned; also blogs don’t get written, stories don’t get published, novels don’t get edited or sent out. Instead I increasingly find myself (figuratively) sitting in a corner of my apartment reciting all the ways that I am a complete and utter failure.
Combine that with sleep deprivation and you get depression lurking at every corner, sharpening its claws and teeth, ready to attack.
But, I should be happy with my life. I have wonderful husband and a healthy, sweet baby boy…what else could I want?
I want to get things done. I don’t want to be just a mama; I want to be an accomplished mama whose son will be proud of her.
Take one step at a time.
When I had difficult projects at my former jobs or at college, I panicked for 5 minutes, got depressed for 10, but finally I made checklists.
Accomplishing one thing at a time not only made me feel good, but got me closer to my goals.
I thought, if I do one new thing a day, get used to it, make it part of my routine and then introduce another, I will, maybe, be able to get things done!
It may not make me an overnight success as a wife/mother/author but each day will be a success.
Whoever thinks a time machine is a fine idea, they’re wrong!
I know time travel is the stuff of fiction but suppose there is a scorned mad genius somewhere in the world right now, or a group of scientists in a secret, underground, government facility and they are close to making this a reality.
I mean, flying was the stuff of fiction at one time, so in case you crazy scientists exist my message to you is this: Don’t do it!
I can understand the fascination with time travel: you can undo wrongs, meet important figures, witness historical events. Plus, I believe scientists such as geologists, archaeologists, and zoologists could really have a unique perspective of how things truly were, if they only could only go back. But is it worth it?
Who would you meet if you could go back in time?
Now, if I also ask the whole of humanity this question today, I bet some specific figures — could be religious leaders, artists, or conquers— will get 100s of millions of mentions.
Time travelers wouldn’t have to meddle with anyone’s affairs, or actively try to change history, for time travel to be bad. Just being there to, let’s say, watch Da Vinci paint the Mona Lisa in Florence during the renaissance, it would create quite the crowd.
The reason I am against time travel is because people will find a way to pollute everything, and the time line is no exception.
Yes, I have no doubt that if people can be greedy and inconsiderate, they will be. If they could be able to pollute a time line, they will do it.
No doubt, the rich will be the only ones at first to be able to afford “time-tourism” (I am sure this is what time-traveling will be called), but before long everyone will be able to do that, effectively ruining history.
So please secret government scientists in the underground facility, and scorned mad geniuses of the world: Don’t do it; don’t create time travel! Let’s just read, or watch a terrible movie about it now and then. Let’s imagine we are there through fiction, without actually being able to have tea with Queen Elizabeth the first. Remember, they say you should never meet your heroes…
By the way, crazy scientists and people who disagree, I published a time-traveling story on the Medium publication: Curiosity Never Killed the Writer. Read it and just think about it, it may open your eyes.
You can read my short story fiction at ceeceestories.wordpress.com
I am a junkie.
An information junkie. The kind of junkie that has to get their daily dose of information about anything and everything. It is a problem, as with all addictions it consumes the better part of my day. I tried to quit, but I got bored and irritable. I need help.
You don’t think it serious?
I am the most forgetful and easily distracted person in the world,because I constantly seek my next fix. I iron shirts and subsequently my fingers, because sometimes I have to read while doing it or else the task will prove too mundane for me to manage to get through with it.
Plus a lot of the info I consume can be gone. I worry that some survival info can be gone to make room for fresh new article on cat psychology. By the way I don’t own a cat, and I am not going to in the foreseeable future. I told you it’s serious.
There is something good about it though, because I have come to know, that having knowledge and being smart are two different things. I am exhibit A. I am certainly not the smartest one (who irons and reads a book at the same time?!)
Oddly, educated people often confuse the two. They might prejudge someone as dumb because they might not know what the Louvre is. Pal, if you tell them, what the Louvre is, they will know. Their ignorance in this area will be gone. But what would it take to cure a prejudging asshole?